The Stupidest Things Ever Said, Number 1

One of my favorite calendars it The 365 Stupidest Things Ever Said. Each day, this gem of a calendar provides me with examples of idiotic statements that are truly jaw-dropping. Every so often, when I’m in the mood, I think I’ll quote from past editions for your amusement. Today’s stupid quote originally appeared on the calendar back to April 1999 (I’ve been buying this calendar a long time). It was so monumentally stupid that I actually saved the sheet from the date. The quote comes from an advertisement in the Pittsburgh Press, c. 1954:

The [hydrogen] bomb’s brilliant gleam reminds me of the brilliant shine Gleam gives to floors. It’s a science marvel.

Nothing like comparing your product to the instrument of thermonuclear holocaust. Even better, it’s done in a totally nonironic, gee-whiz sort of way. Man, I’d love to see the illustration associated with that ad.