Musical Male Humpbacks Score More Gals!

“Some people call me Maurice.” Humpback whale, Megaptera novaeangliae

A study from two Australian researchers from the University of Sydney shows that male humpbacks who sing while migrating have better luck with the ladies than those who don’t.

Michael Noad and a group of colleagues tracked a population of humpbacks while it migrated to its Antarctic breeding grounds.

Noad found that male humpbacks who sing while migrating averaged only 2.5 km/hour as opposed to non-singing males who averaged 4 km/hour. Noad and his team are speculating that by slowing down and singing the males allow themselves to be heard by processions of passing females, and perhaps improve their chances of being recognized and thus getting lucky once they reach the breeding grounds.

Noad believes that his research may eventually lead to the evolutionary basis for how any human woman can possibly be attracted to Wayne Newton, and he hopes to one day immunize the entire female population of the Earth against this “abhorrent, genetic anomaly.”