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Humor Science fiction/fantasy

I can answer that question!

Since I’m still immersed in grant writing, to start the afternoon off, here’s one that I saw a week ago but never got around to answering. It’s a question from this week’s host of the Skeptics’ Circle, Bronze Dog, over at (appropriately enough) The Bronze Blog, who asks:

You’ve been captured by Daleks. You’re their legendary foe who always comes up with some clever way of thwarting their plans for universal domination. They’re equipped with a death ray, nigh-impenetrable armor, and a plunger that somehow works as a multitool.

Why don’t they just shoot you?

I can answer that one! Although many of the answers in the comments are quite good, I think I have the real answer. Just think about it. It’s the same reason that, when James Bond is captured, the villain doesn’t just have one of his henchmen take him out in the back and put a bullet in the back of his head, but instead goes into a long explanation of what he’s doing and how brilliant his plan is before picking an improbably ridiculous method of execution (laser beams, piranhas, G-force centrifuges, etc.), often with witty repartee like this:

James Bond: Do you expect me to talk?
Goldfinger: No, Mr. Bond. I expect you to die.

Yes, it’s the very same reason!

As Dr. Evil would say, “You know, I have one simple request. And that is to have sharks with frickin’ laser beams attached to their heads!” Personally, my question would be: “Can I have a Dalek with something other than a frickin’ stalk with an electronic eye on it that’s so easily blinded?”

By Orac

Orac is the nom de blog of a humble surgeon/scientist who has an ego just big enough to delude himself that someone, somewhere might actually give a rodent's posterior about his copious verbal meanderings, but just barely small enough to admit to himself that few probably will. That surgeon is otherwise known as David Gorski.

That this particular surgeon has chosen his nom de blog based on a rather cranky and arrogant computer shaped like a clear box of blinking lights that he originally encountered when he became a fan of a 35 year old British SF television show whose special effects were renowned for their BBC/Doctor Who-style low budget look, but whose stories nonetheless resulted in some of the best, most innovative science fiction ever televised, should tell you nearly all that you need to know about Orac. (That, and the length of the preceding sentence.)

DISCLAIMER:: The various written meanderings here are the opinions of Orac and Orac alone, written on his own time. They should never be construed as representing the opinions of any other person or entity, especially Orac's cancer center, department of surgery, medical school, or university. Also note that Orac is nonpartisan; he is more than willing to criticize the statements of anyone, regardless of of political leanings, if that anyone advocates pseudoscience or quackery. Finally, medical commentary is not to be construed in any way as medical advice.

To contact Orac: [email protected]

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