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I wish I’d had this T shirt at TAM7

Well, I’m back.

After my trip to TAM7, I’m back in the real world, jet-lagged and tired. So it may take me a while–hopefully only a little while–to get back to my usual prolific output, and there will be something later today. In the meantime, just let me say I really, really wish I had had this T shirt to wear at TAM7:

i-e4345fe33004d4583f6039fb6b32624d-Jesusscientist.jpg

Well, actually I wish I had a G-rated version of the shirt to wear. I don’t generally wear T shirts with profanity on them.

If such a shirt existed, then all I would need to complete my wardrobe would be this one:

i-0f9c2e57ba6eab3793d2cbfcabd8fc1a-Noahsdilemma.jpg

That would be a problem, wouldn’t it?

By Orac

Orac is the nom de blog of a humble surgeon/scientist who has an ego just big enough to delude himself that someone, somewhere might actually give a rodent's posterior about his copious verbal meanderings, but just barely small enough to admit to himself that few probably will. That surgeon is otherwise known as David Gorski.

That this particular surgeon has chosen his nom de blog based on a rather cranky and arrogant computer shaped like a clear box of blinking lights that he originally encountered when he became a fan of a 35 year old British SF television show whose special effects were renowned for their BBC/Doctor Who-style low budget look, but whose stories nonetheless resulted in some of the best, most innovative science fiction ever televised, should tell you nearly all that you need to know about Orac. (That, and the length of the preceding sentence.)

DISCLAIMER:: The various written meanderings here are the opinions of Orac and Orac alone, written on his own time. They should never be construed as representing the opinions of any other person or entity, especially Orac's cancer center, department of surgery, medical school, or university. Also note that Orac is nonpartisan; he is more than willing to criticize the statements of anyone, regardless of of political leanings, if that anyone advocates pseudoscience or quackery. Finally, medical commentary is not to be construed in any way as medical advice.

To contact Orac: [email protected]

28 replies on “I wish I’d had this T shirt at TAM7”

Well, if I could edit the shirts to be elementary-school acceptable

tshirt # 1
Jesus is a really lousy scientist or
Jesus: great guy
lousy scientist

tshirt #

Dang! or Uh-oh

See, rational thinking starts early…but you have to have age-appropriate language.

Noah’s real dilemma begins after he runs out of other species to feed to the T Rex. Of course, the real Noah used propofol to sedate all of the animals and Ensure to feed them. The miracle was creating the Big Pharma manufacturer to make these.

Each animal also had a Foley catheter and a feces bag. Then there were problems with the nursing staff (Noah’s family), but this was before the Creation of unions.

Then there is the problem of keeping track of 2 of each bacterium. Separate rooms. Gosh, what if they mutate?

Jesus was a character in children’s stories.
Like Pecos Bill, or Paul Bunyan and Babe the Blue Ox.
Or the Little Engine that Could.

Rogue Medic, thats what happened to the unicorn you know, the T-Rex ate him before the drugs took effect.

Um, I don’t get the first one. Is there some Jesus story where he does something remotely related to science?

Rogue Medic, thats what happened to the unicorn you know, the T-Rex ate him before the drugs took effect.

Serves Noah right for using that homeopathic animal tranquilizer on the T-Rex.

Is there some Jesus story where he does something remotely related to science?

Ms. Williams tells me that Jesus turned the water into wine
You’d think somebody could do something like that
Would be a friend of mine. –Ray Wylie Hubbard “No Lie”

Propoflo is too short-acting, needs constant IV administration and close monitoring of the patients, way too labor-intensive…acepromazine works better to keep ’em bombed

How about instead of having actual animals on the ark, we rewrite the story and have Noah and his artistic daughters-in-law produce clay replicas of the animals (just so god wouldn’t forget what he made) and then when it is all over but the eating, god the poofta just poofs them all to life. I mean, he’s done it before, certainly he couldn’t forget how in such a short time, could he?

Man, you’d all better hope that Jesus isn’t actually the son of God. Or if he is, that he has a really good sense of humor.

See, rational thinking starts early…but you have to have age-appropriate language

You think there’s a single elementary schooler anywhere who doesn’t say “shit” at least every other day?

You think there’s a single elementary schooler anywhere who doesn’t say “shit” at least every other day?

Plenty of them? I have 4 kids, and none of them have ever said “shit” to my knowledge. Only two are in school this year, but I know a lot of kids who aren’t exposed to that type of language.

I, too, try to avoid crude language on my shirts, which is unortunate, as the “SCIENCE It works, bitches” shirt at XKCD is awesome.

I have that T-shirt, which I do wear on occasion. (To date, much appreciative chuckles and no obvious disdain, although I don’t wear it around kids.) It was a generous gift from a colleague that served with me on the committee revising our state science standards.

Plenty of them? I have 4 kids, and none of them have ever said “shit” to my knowledge.

Trust me, they hear it daily on the playground. I’ve actually BEEN a kid.

Man, you’d all better hope that Jesus isn’t actually the son of God. Or if he is, that he has a really good sense of humor.

1) Man, you’d better hope that you’ve adequately been following the path of Sanatana, Or that Vishnu has a really good sense of humor. Otherwise, you’ll be a goat in your next life. If you’re lucky.

Point: So classy to imply threats.

2) I don’t have to hope. If a deity existed, it would be as real to the sane people as it is to the delusional.

Adtually, Yeshua bar Yosef would probably, were he alive today, have been very interested in and very pro-science, as would be expected of a rabbi whose main influence was Hillel. It’s just those who insist on calling him by the title he never claimed, “The Anointed One” (= “The Chrismed One’ = ‘the Christ’) who are the lousy scientists.

I do like to ask them, though, that if Jesus were all-knowing, why didn’t he introduce printing — not movable type, which might not have been possible, but at least ‘carved-block’ printing? That way he could have been sure that his words weren’t as mangled as they became after 1500 years of manual copying of them. Of course, I also don’t understand why he didn’t write his own book, or dictate one, but then these supposed ‘prophets’ never do. Even Mohammed, supposedly being given ‘God’s final message for humanioty’ never bothered to take the simple step of ordering a follower to ‘write down what I say’ and it took 20 years after his death before somebody realized they should do it — from memory.

I like,

“Jesus loves you… But everyone else thinks your a C**t!”

It’s profane, but funny as hell.

Ever considered the possibility that Noah took young animals on the ark? Like cubs and baby dinos?

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