Now why can’t I get papers like this published?

Now here’s some perfect reading for a lazy stay-at-home vacation day. It’s even pretty science-y. Well, math-y, at least. It may even be the best scientific paper ever. The title says it all:

When Zombies Attack: Mathematical Modeling of an Outbreak of Zombie Infection

The long version is at the link above.

The short version is that, if this ever happens, we’re screwed.

The intermediate version is at Night of the Living Model.