Beyond butt reflexology


You remember my fun little post about a Sokal-type hoax perpetrated by John C. McLachlan, when he completely fooled the “scientific review” committee of a complementary and alternative medicine conference with a hilarious Sokal-inspired hoax in which he created, in essence, butt reflexology. I thought it was an amusing and fairly original bit of made-up woo.

It turns out I was wrong. A reader just pointed me to Jacqueline Stalline’s Rumpology. It turns out that she’s an astrologer, and that she thinks she can tell a lot about you by reading your rump:

Jacqueline Stallone has revived the ancient art of Rumpology. Just as a printo of your fingerprints, palms, soles, and ears tell a story, so does your rump.

I’ll bet. Stallone even invites her fans to send her pictures of their posteriors for a reading:

The lines, crevices, and folds of your fanny, rear-end for those of you in the UK, can, to the trained eye, reveal your personality, fate, and future in luck and love. So they thought in ancient India and Babylon and so today. The Greeks used palm and behind prints to determine health and fidelity. The Romans used the prints to identify potential future success. The prints reveal your whole being.

I have no doubt that a print of one’s posterior can reveal one’s whole being. Some people are real asses, after all.